The Happiness of Postive Expectations
Be watchful here. This is another one of those times when I need to remind you about the four most dangerous words in the English language: “I already know that.” Familiarity with a common truth, remember, isn’t the same thing as actually living it in your very own life. And if you really want to make that one precious life of yours juicier, this is one happiness practice you will really want to master. It’s the practice of expecting the best.
It’s teaching yourself the habit of looking forward to seeing all the good experiences that will unfold throughout your day . . . the bits of pleasure and friendliness, the pieces of valuable information, the opportunities to use your strengths. When you wake up in the morning, before you even move, let yourself suppose that it’s going to be a great day—an especially interesting day, with all kinds of happy surprises tucked in its curves and corners. Then get up, and go out and prove it to yourself.
How? By collecting evidence. Here, let me give you a big Tupperware container with a snap-tight lid and a big comfy handle. (Since it’s invisible and weightless, you can easily carry it everywhere.) Now, every time you catch yourself enjoying something, make a mental note of it, and stick it in your Tupperware and take it home. Get a smile from someone? Stick it in your Tupperware. Hear a joke? See a piece of beauty? Get a lucky message? Learn a lesson? Stick it in your Tupperware.
Here’s the deal—the part where you have to be careful to hear with fresh ears: What you focus on expands. Ask and you shall receive. Seek and you shall find. When you form an expectation, a powerful little part of your magnificent brain (the reticular activating formation, to be exact) filters through all the millions of bits of data coming in through your senses and calls your attention to the things that you are expecting to see.
Expecting to be cucumber cool, regardless of the situations you find yourself in? Expecting to be surprised by beauty? By kindness? By humor? By opportunities to serve? Expecting to connect with the people in your life in uplifting ways? Expecting answers to some of your puzzles?
Look for evidence of your expectations and then put them in your Tupperware. At the end of the day, open it up and see what you have found. Expect to be delighted and amazed.
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